Letter from the Penis to Management
Dear Management
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
1. the physical labor I endure on a daily basis is tiresome
2. I work at great depths
3. I plunge head first into everything I do
4. I do not receive weekends or public holidays off
5. I work in a damp environment
6. I don't get paid over-time
7. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
8. I work in high temperatures and
9. My work exposes me to contagious diseases
LETTER TO PENIS FROM MANAGEMENT.
Dear Penis:
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration REJECTS your request for the following reasons:
1. You cannot work 8 hours straights
2. You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods
3. You do not stay in your designated work area and are often seen visiting other locations
4. You do not take initiative - you need to be pleasured and stimulated in order to start working
5. You leave the work place rather messy at the end of your shift
6. You don't always observe the necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing
7. You will retire well before you are 65 years
8. You are unable to work double shifts
9. You sometimes leave your designated work before you have completed you assigned task
10. and if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and existing the work place carrying two suspicious bags.
signed
Management
